Bumpy Road

Last week, I got a phone call about 10 am from our daycare.

There are few things more frightening than seeing the daycare's name on Caller ID. They rarely call us to say "OH MY GOD! Conor just did the most amazingly cute thing!!!!"

Instead, calls from daycare involve temperatures, throwing up, and/or bumps on the head. This phone call was only slightly different: bumps on Conor's legs. Red, raised bumps that were unusual and all over the bottom of his legs and moving up his thighs.

"Hmmmmmm," I said. "Those might be normal. It's not unusual for the boy's in my family to have bumps all over their legs."

"Hmmmmmm," she responded. "They look really unusual. I haven't seen these before."

The day before, Conor had been outside and around an area in which we've spotted poison ivy. So I decided not to chance it (and sound like a slathernly mother) and came on in to look at the bumps on my son's legs.

They were normal. For us. Well, for me and my kin.

We have shitty ass skin. My arms are covered in horrible bumps that my doctor's tell me that all we can do to fix them is put on lots of lotion. I don't have these bumps on my legs, but the boys apparently do. The pediatrician had told us to be sure and put lotion on Conor's legs, but honestly, we are only consistent after his bath.

What was so embarrassing was having the primary daycare provider, the director of the center, and oh, a few other people wandering down the hall staring at my poor son's bumpy legs. I know it's because of our curly hair. There's something about our hair that makes our arms and legs so bumpy. We can't do anything about it--and yes, we know it's not "normal" for you straighthaired people. But back away from our bumpy bodies!!!

Well, ever since then, we've been much, much better about putting lotion on Conor's legs and they are truly much better. I've even taken to putting lotion on my arms twice a day to see if I can help my arms smooth out. It really does make a difference.

I just have visions of the choice my son has in his awkward teenage years: bumpy arms and legs or putting on lotion on his extra long arms and legs at school after gym class. Do they still have gym class these days? Is it still as awkward now as it was for us? Maybe he can only use it in the morning and at night and not at school. I can tell you right now, he's not going to outgrow this.