Exhibit A in the Miscarriage Freak Show

So, ummm, yeah.

I probably need to explain the motivation behind yesterday's first post. I have no doubt that folks out there might think I'm a big fat freak for taking multiple pregnancy tests after receiving a positive one. And, I suppose, if you wait until you are actually "late" to take one and you end up with two screaming pink or blue lines, then there really is no reason to take more than one. You just call up the doc and get that confirmation visit.

But if you are like other people, (*ahem*, me), and use the First Response Early Result (FRER) tests that can pick up even the faintest of pregnancy hormones revealing a line that you have to verify with a partner that it (the line, not the partner) even exists and isn't in your imagination, then yes, you might take another test the next day, hoping to see another, darker line. And when you take that test and see only a slightly darker line which is still not clearly obvious then you might take ANOTHER test the next day hoping to see that clear positive line. And you might not go to the doctor for verification because 1) it's the weekend and 2) the FRERs are much more sensitive pee sticks than what the doctor has so the test at the doctor's office might still show up negative and you're not evne using first morning urine (FMU) and you don't want the doctor to say "You're an idiot; you're not pregnant. You're not even late yet!! How do you know you're pregnant when you are only 11 days past ovulation?" and then you have to fight him/her for a blood test.

So.

We weren't supposed to get pregnant this month so soon after the D&E. We didn't try to get pregnant this month. However, call us as stupid as teenagers in highschool, we forgot to use birthcontrol this month.

That's not true. We didn't even think of using birth control this month. But after two years of TTC, I don't even think about birth control anymore. But I know my body pretty well and afterwards I could tell I was in the very fertile stage around ovulation. I tried to tell the doctor, but the nurse was not amused and said "DON'T GET PREGNANT THIS MONTH!" I tried to explain that we weren't trying to get pg this month, but, ummm, you know.

Nonetheless, guess what?

Yeah.

And then guess what?

I could tell by the second day's test results that the news was not ultimately going to be good. By day 4 of testing (Monday), we were back down to almost negative. I say "almost" because there was still a light of thousand suns line there. But after 4 days of testing, we should have been able to spot that line in the twilight.

So. Apparently, we do not have a problem getting pregnant. I did not waste all that birthcontrol in my 20's. But I am miscarrying freak. My eggs suck.

We have now been pregnant at least 5 times in the last two years. (There are possibly two more chem pgs, but they were only positive for one day, not multiple days; so it's possible those were evaporation lines. But I don't think so). We've only had 3 clinically recognized pregnancies, but really, we've had 5 (or 7!) chances in the last 23 months, not counting the of 4 months we weren't trying because we were already pregnant.

When I look at it that way, things certainly do not look promising for us to have another bio child.