All this Knowledge and Still no MD

I swear I feel like I ought to be granted a special certification in OB-GYN.

Actually, the problem most likely is that I only know a little, but the little I know expands into the entire space of what I want to know and then feels like “a lot.” Wide and shallow would be the best description. Like my butt.

Anyhoo………

We’ve had another “event” this month. This one involves another chemical pregnancy.

We got our first faint positive pregnant test with the First Response Early Response on Monday, 10 dpo. Yes, I know that’s early, and honestly I had no intention of testing, but when I woke up and my basal body temperature was 98.6, I was shocked. And curious. The only time my BBT gets that high is when I’m pregnant. I am a classic triphasic fertility TTC charter thingy chick.

So I thought to myself, “Myself, are you pregnant?” I took the test and lo and behold, I was. “Yippee!!!” I thought. There’s only a 13% chance of miscarriage the first 6 weeks if the little guy implants on day 9 or before, so we were pretty psyched to get a positive test at 10 dpo.

I took another test the next day and the line was darker! Yippee again! It was clearly and unambiguously positive!!

I took a test the next day, and it was faint again. Thus I began to worry.

I took another test yesterday and the line was barely there. “This is Not Good,” I thought to myself. Myself sadly agreed.

I called up the doctor and they asked me to come in and take a blood test. That was yesterday afternoon and I’m waiting for them to call with the results this morning. (I’m having a hard time focusing) Oh, and I guess I should mention about how I arrived and their computers were down and they told me I couldn’t get my blood drawn and my head nearly exploded and I informed them through gritted teeth and locked jaw that I was having a miscarriage and they had damn well better take my blood today. (maybe an exaggeration because it’s not a “real” miscarriage. Nonetheless.).

Then the very nice receptionist came over to apologize and I burst out into tears (which I have not done at all during this whole pregnant-not-staying-pregnant dealio). And then the nurse came to get me just as I was gaining composure and I lost it all over again.

Although I’m quick to cry, I really hate doing it in public especially in front of people I don’t know but know something intimate about me.

Pretty much, I felt like a nut.

As an aside, we were playing a game called Catch Phrase this weekend in which you break into teams and try to get your partner to say a particular word or phrase. Dave and my friend Brian were on the other team; it was Brian’s turn and the first clue he gave to Dave was “Anita is….” Dave shouted out “A nut!”

It was the correct answer.

Back to the not being pregnant: So, ummm, yeah! I was. Now I’m not. In the last 6 months we’ve been trying to conceive, I’ve had two chemical pregnancies (that I know of) and one full on miscarriage.

So we can get things started, but we can’t “seal the deal.”

I’ll update at the bottom of this entry after the doctor calls.

Edited to Add: The doctor called. My beta was at 4 and progesterone was low. So I was pregnant, but am not now. The dicussion we had is where do we go next?